[轉錄]How to Release the Pressure in Life(中文)

先說好，這不是我喔 囧

How to Release the Pressure in Life
如何釋放生活中的壓力

As a high school student,I'm under a lot of pressure
身為一名高中生 我的生活處在極大的壓力之中

It's quite important to release the pressure so that I won't be overwhelmed.
釋放壓力是件滿重要的事 這樣我才不會崩潰

Like many male teenagers,the way I relax is masturbation.
就像許多鄉民一樣 我的放鬆方式是打手槍

I've been watching porns since junior high.
我國中就在看A片了

A classmate lent me a DVD,telling me ,"There's something exciting in it!"
班上一個同學借了我一片DVD 說" 幹 裡面真是有夠給他精采!! "

I put it in the DVD player and pressed the "PLAY" button.
我把DVD放入光碟機裡然後按下 "播放" 按鈕

After about 15 minutes,I jizzed.
大概15分鐘我就繳械了

I can't help masturbating since then.
從此之後我就不能自已了

When I get scolded,I jerk off.
當我被罵 我就打槍

When I get bad grades,I jerk off.
當我被當 我就打槍

When I broke up with my girlfriend,I jerk off.
當我被劈 我也打槍

Every time I feel depressed,I masturbate.
反正每當心情不好就是要給他來一槍

As the "glue" comes out,which makes me reach orgasm,the pressure is gone.
每當 洨 流出來的時候 我感到高潮 那種酥麻的快感把身上的壓力全部釋放

I think everybody should masturbate when he(or she) is in a bad mood.
我覺得不管是他或她 都應該在心情不好的時候手淫一下

It does help a lot.
多多益善